Thursday, March 18, 2010

Occasionally...

...Every now and then it so happens that I encounter a medical situation in my life that warrants a prescription opiate of some sort - such as that in an anti-histamine or a powerful painkiller for migraine. And then, for a few beautiful hours, I enter an alternative universe in which even endless work seems like fun, fun, fun - and i don't feel like sleeping even after a fourteen-hour shift. There is a lot to be said for a dull opiate straight up to the brain - especially when the brain is given to a useless kind of hyper-awareness, such as obsessively remembering useless details: what exactly some idiot said to you in the middle of a hailstorm in 1993, or an orange-rimmed magnifying glass that disappeared from your school desk in 1976.

So what an opiate seems to do is: it makes humdrum things see rather interesting and exciting, and it significantly takes the edge off miserable thoughts. As for morphine, I cannot praise it enough, the best week of my life having been one in which it was pumping through my veins (after surgery). I remember thinking: So this is what optimists feel like all the time. I dashed to a party (still bleeding slightly from the operative wound), full of enthusiasm to meet new people (otherwise an ordeal); cheated without shame at Pictionary at the same party (even though my mother taught me never to cheat at board games); set up a date with the best looking girl in the room (need I add that in a morphine-free world, this would never have happened?), and in general was the life and soul of the evening...or thought I was, which is more or less the same thing.

So the most recent medical condition that warranted an opiatic intervention was - a common cold. Man, those heavy duty cold medications are something else. They're great. Every dark cloud, such as my flu-filled week, has a point it seems - and in this case it was to make it clear to me that my perception of cold and flu as bad things was a big mistake. No, you get to lie-in and pop those magic pills which put your body in a state of sleep, but your mind in happy bliss. I didn't even need the usual supply of stupid fantasies in order to make the day bearable. Why are people with hay-fever always complaining? They must be popping the stuff all the time.